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 Vampire Kid: "Wow, Hermie, I think there was a psycho drug or something in that candy I just ate! I feel funny!" Zombie Kid: "Well, you're better off than me. I think I just ate a razor blade!" |
It has become a festival for perverts, urban predators
By ANDY MURCIA
of TheColumnists.com
Halloween is an obsolete holiday, if you ask me. It has seen its best day, if it ever had one. Back in the 1950s, when I was a kid, it only meant we’d eat a lot of crap sugar products, rot our teeth, make ourselves fat and get into trouble for using soap on windows and other assorted vandalisms.
So, why do we have such a thing as Halloween?
I’d say it’s so the candy making and peddling folks
can make more dough selling their products.
I just read about an incident that happened as folks were readying
their costumes for those Halloween office parties. A man wearing
what appeared to be a gorilla mask and waving a stun gun robbed
a taco stand early in the city of La Mesa in eastern San Diego
County.
Police say the masked man had an accomplice, who entered the
taco stand around midnight and ordered a burrito. While the clerk
was busy fixing the burrito, the masked man entered and demanded
money. After cleaning out the cash drawer, the two perps fled
on foot with an undisclosed amount of money. Taco stand? How
much could they have gotten, $300 on the high end? Halloween
offered these bums a way to hide their identity while sticking
the joint up.
Stick-ups like the one above happen every Halloween. Why we still
celebrate this thing called Halloween is beyond me. Sure I trick
or treated when I was a little kid but that was before I really
knew anything much about this “holiday”. As I grew
up I learned nobody except a few cross dressers who like to wear
their mothers’ dresses even give a crap about Halloween.
How safe is it for our kids? Simply stated, it’s NOT!
As bad as it sounds, this is just a fact of life now. Get on the Internet and check your local state website for sex offenders. Almost every state has one; just do a search for your state sex offender site. Look up your zip code and it should have a list of registered sex offenders in your area that includes street addresses. You bet these perverts love it when kids knock on their door. Parents wake up – don’t give these guys access to your kids! Make sure that your kids stay away from these houses! ?
So, they get a bag of cheap candy. The
candy may be laced with narcotics and poisons. Now with Halloween
upon us, The Narcotics Bureau of the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s
Department just reminded the citizens of Los Angeles County of
a health hazard that was discovered last year, and well may be
in your community too.
Parents, teachers, and physicians are warned to closely inspect
children’s candy, soda, and snack items to ensure children
do not accidentally ingest a concentrated drug.
In recent months, thousands of illicit edible products have been
seized in the form of candies, cookies, cereal snacks, and bottled
soda, all containing varying amounts of concentrated tetrahydrocannabinol
(THC), the main psychoactive substance found in the marijuana
plant.
We will no doubt hear on the news that some poor kid looking for some candy got either poisoned or killed by some child molester. For God’s sake, if you still want to let your kids go trick or treating, after knowing all this and more, at least you, dad, and perhaps a few more dads should go with them and watch over them. Or better yet, put on a scary movie at home, invite your kid’s friends over, give them candy and snacks while scaring them a little in a safe environment.
I personally wish that some wise politician will come up with a proposition that will let us vote to abolish this lousy “trick or treat” practice. And, for that matter, Halloween itself. We can let the candy makers eat their own stale candy and let us keep our kids and ourselves safe. Now that would be a real “treat”.
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