TheColumnists.com

 ELECTION
WARS
2004

 PATRICK McFADDEN

 

 STARVED FOR
SOUNDBITES:
The Kerry Conundrum


An ill-advised Texas campaign stop
by Sen. Kerry, trying to evoke memories of Lyndon Johnson by wearing a
10-gallon hat and doing 13-minute
'soundbites' on why he loves
country music and Lone Star beer.

Why can't Kerry ventilate
Bush with deft soundbites?

By PATRICK McFADDEN
of TheColumnists.com

Memorandum

To: My fellow Democrats
From: Your friendly neighborhood pundit
Re: How you blew the 2004 presidential campaign

I understand. You really, really, really don’t like the president. I get it. And you are so desperate to win this year that “electability” became the most important quality in choosing a candidate.

But here’s what I don’t get: In your feverish haste to nominate someone who is “electable” and capable of defeating George W. Bush, you may have chosen a candidate lacking the one indispensable quality for any modern president. John Kerry can’t speak in soundbites.

In the weeks since the end of the Democratic National Convention, Team Bush has resumed carpet bombing on Kerry’s knack for nuance. The Kerry campaign’s inability to fend off these attacks with clear, crisp and concise counterpunches shows me that in your rush to nominate a resume rather than a candidate, you may have blown the whole shooting match.

Take, for example, the issue of Kerry’s vote against the $87 billion for funding the occupation and reconstruction of Iraq. The Bush campaign had the president shout “There is nothing complicated about supporting our troops!” If you’re John Kerry, within 24 hours you have to be on television saying, “If there’s nothing complicated about it, Mr. President, why did you consider vetoing that money?” That would have been the end of the issue, because Bush would lose his whole point by trying to explain how complicated it all really was.

Or the bigger Iraq question of Kerry’s support for the war and the occupation. If you’re John Kerry, within 24 hours you need to be on television telling people, “There is nothing complicated about my position. It is this: Your incompetence is getting American soldiers and marines killed unnecessarily.” That’s the soundbite.

You have the arguments to back it up. “I supported the war, but you’ve bungled the occupation. You and your neo-conservative friends can’t shoot straight. It’s simple. You didn’t send enough troops into the country and you didn’t bring along enough military police. That $87 billion? You haven’t spent reconstruction money fast enough to bring jobs and prosperity to Iraq. Your insistence on total de-Baathification has created a ready-made, organized opposition to the occupation rather than giving former Baathists a stake in a stable Iraqi society. I voted to give you the authority to wage war, and you have failed me, my constituents, and our troops as commander-in-chief. That’s my position. What part didn’t you understand?”

If you really want to go bulldog, you also have plenty of low blows you can throw. “You want to talk about flip flops? How about your buddy Ahmad Chalabi? What’s he up to these days? By the way, you prance around the flight deck of any aircraft carriers lately? I thought you looked snazzy in that flight suit.”

I don’t know why Kerry won’t do this. Is he simply too smart and principled to oversimplify things to the extent necessary to win a campaign? Does he lack the guts to throw a political elbow? Are his handlers incompetent? Has he been a senator for too long to avoid speaking in prose?

I don’t know, but you better figure it out fast and solve it or you’re sunk. You’ve nominated a tremendously ungifted politician. He has zero charisma, he’s boring, his sentences are too long, and he can’t give snappy, pat answers. The fact that Kerry is neck and neck in this horserace, and might actually win, is a stunning repudiation of Bush’s policies. Someone who could communicate effectively on television would crush George W. Bush.

Here’s why that really matters. Kerry’s oratorical inadequacy has implications far beyond the current election, which Kerry may win by default.

The ability to speak directly to people through the medium of television isn’t just window dressing. It’s not like wearing nice suits or conservative ties. It’s a qualification for being an effective president. Part of the job is the ability to explain your policies. Presidents have to make people understand complex issues in simple terms to rally support. If Kerry wins, he may face Republican control of both houses of Congress. If he can’t use the bully pulpit to end run Congress and speak directly to the American people, he can’t govern.

You chose to nominate a resume, but it turns out your selection may not actually be qualified.

©2004 by Patrick McFadden. The cartoon is from IMSI's Master Clips Collection, 1895 Francisco Blvd. E., San Rafael, CA, 94901-5506, USA.


You can comment on this column online. Please address your message to either "The Editors" or Patrick McFadden. To send an email, click here: talkback@thecolumnists.com

 Home  About Us Archives  Talkback   Shopping Mall