|
MAN ABOUT LONDON |
|
|
of BEING SCARED SPEECHLESS |
"Yes, it's nice to be up in front of you all again. Just ig-n-n-nore the stammering and the growing s-s-stain in my trousers and we'll be okay." |
Terrified of giving a talk?
There's hope for you!
By ROBERT TAYLOR
of TheColumnists.com
Scared speechless? You’re not
alone
Interviewed on a chat show last week, Tony Blair told a joke
against himself. He recalled being asked at a Paris press conference whether
he ever imitated President Chirac’s policies. Replying in French, he wanted to
say: “Yes, I like to imitate many of your President’s policies.” But the
pressure got to him, and instead he blurted out: “Yes, I like to have your
President in many different positions.”
When even polished performers
like the prime minister can get all tongue-tied, it’s not surprising that
improving your presentation skills has become one of the crazes of the early
21st century. We have quite a way to go, because, if the surveys are to be
believed, a staggering 75 per cent of us are afraid of public speaking. We
fear it even more than death, as Jerry Seinfeld observed when he said, "The
average person would rather be in the casket than doing the eulogy”.
Yet squirming out of it is ever more difficult. Nearly everyone now
has to speak at meetings, conferences or pitches, and nobody gets anywhere if
they can't give decent presentations. Unfortunately this means that we have to
overcome a fear that, in its acute form, doesn’t just involve wobbly knees and
mispronounced French words. Full-on “glossophobia” induces hyperventilation
and even blackouts.
History’s most toe-curling public-speaking
embarrassment illustrates the ghastly symptoms. It was almost exactly 80 years
ago, when Britain’s Duke of York, later to become King George VI, gave a
shambolic maiden speech at the British Empire exhibition at Wembley stadium.
He had a debilitating stammer and was terrified of speaking in any public
setting--let alone in front of 100,000 people. A grainy film shows the
audience shuffling awkwardly as the Duke shakily begins to speak … before he
grinds to a dreadful, premature halt.
Glossophobics know exactly how
he felt. But this makes it all the more admirable that so many of them have
started to confront their demons. In a mass demonstration of nerve-steeling,
glossophobics are surely creating history by being the biggest group of
phobics to try to overcome their fear at one time.
They’re taking
their bow with organisations offering public-speaking courses--which are being
swamped with applications. Toastmasters International now has a quarter of a
million members in 90 countries. In Britain the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art
is replacing acting lessons with presentation training for some of the
country’s biggest companies. There are hundreds more besides, all full of
useful titbits: some recommend visualising the audience completely naked to
reverse the sense of vulnerability (Winston Churchill’s tactic), while others
suggest Maggie Thatcher’s more brutal approach--She would say to herself,
“Now, come on, dear!”
Hypnotherapists, cognitive behaviour therapists,
herbalists and neuro-linguistic programmers are all getting in on the act,
too. Stuart Brody, a psychologist at Scotland's University of Paisley, even
prescribes sex. He found that the more sexually active you are the better you
cope with public speaking, because your blood pressure returns to normal more
quickly.
But real phobics know that they’re eventually just going
to have to get up and do it … whatever it takes. I used to be glossophobic
myself. For many years the only way I could bring myself to give a speech was
to drink heavily beforehand (I really empathise with the way Truman Capote
knocks back cognac in the recent film). It was a risky strategy--like jumping
out of the path of a speeding car only to risk being knocked down by a
bus--and it relied on the adrenalin and the alcohol cancelling each other out.
It worked for me.
The Duke of York was more conventional. He never
overcame his fear completely, but he learned to cope after consulting a speech
therapist, and, as King, he went on to deliver some great speeches and
broadcasts that inspired his nation during the Second World War. If ever the
modern glossophobic needs a role model, then King George VI surely provides
it.
That’s the irony--that glossophobics, if they can just get over
their fear, are likely to be better public speakers than the average. Why?
Because their condition is a strand of social anxiety disorder, which stems
from a fear of being judged or criticised. So they work extra hard at keeping
their audience interested and entertained, and they prepare extra-thoroughly,
so they’re unlikely to be caught off guard when talking about French
Presidents.
Glossophobics should have the courage of their
convictions, safe in the knowledge that they can’t be worse than the plain
awful non-glossophobic public speakers already out there, who don’t mind
droning on about any old drivel. And those sitting in the audience should
welcome this approaching army of trembling glossophobics with open arms. For
“glossos” may be scared rigid, they may shake uncontrollably and they may
black out half way through. Some of them don’t even reach the
stage.
But rest assured: They’ll never bore you.
©2006 by Robert Taylor. The cartoon is from IMSI's
Master Clips Collection, 1895 Francisco Blvd. E., San Rafael, CA, 94901-5506,
USA. This column first posted April 22, 2006.
You
can comment on this column online. Please address your message to either "The
Editors" or Robert Taylor. To send an email, click here and don't forget to
mention Robert's name: mailto:Syndpack@aol.com
|
|
|
Archives |
|
|